I come to this site every now and again, (usually when my hubby is on nights) looking for uplifting commentary. My husband is a police officer and as all leo's know, it is most times a very thankless job.

I used to get so mad when I read and heard about the things that the police go through on what should be routine calls and the way the police end up sounding like the bad guys. But then, there are stories like yours and I have to take a step back and re-evaluate. I will say that with all my heart, I believe that the unfeeling cops are the exception. (Unfeeling and obviously not suited to their profession.)

My husband lost a very dear friend and partner to what amounted to an ambush on the police. The toll that takes on the police and their families is indescribable. He left a wife and children. (I have young children who still have a terrible time dealing with it and it happened almost three years ago.) Then, to watch him go back out the next day, when all I wanted to do was pack up and go back to our home town, was almost more than I could bear.

I cannot express enough how sorry I am that you encountered police officer's like you described. It saddens me so much to see some of my own fears realized.

I'm really glad to see that you have had a chance to read stories on a more positive level involving police officers. I know that there are some really bad ones out there, but the good ones risk their lives every day trying to keep their communities safe.

First of all, I'm very happy to have another female respond to me whether it be another police officer or wife of one. It's also interesting to hear aspects of a more inside outlook, which you have given me.

Your message on this board has left me somewhat verbally lost for what can I convey to a person who is afraid of losing her husband through his work, you're children most definately have the same fear, along with a close friend/police officer of yourselves who tragically lost his life from a homicide on the job? This might sound trite (although I so very much don't mean it like this), but I really am sorry about the extremities of life lessons all of you have had to endure. I cannot imagine what it psychologically would do to a person to lose their best friend like that, how you personally can see your husband leaving most every day for what can be an extremely unsafe profession, and then your kids......damn. ALL children should be sheltered from the harsh realities of the world and not ever have to think about if daddy is going to come home alive or not - it makes me feel simultaneous anger and saddness they are learning at such an ungodly early age what the darker aspect of the human race can be like, and the destructiveness it can wreak upon undeserving lives. I truly do hope all your fears will be unwarrented, and that your husband will continue his job and never be seriously harmed.

I also actually don't doubt most police officers have some decency in them and experience their jobs as being "thankless" - that really is a tragedy of sorts. As I said in my last posted message, I believe they do jobs most of us couldn't stomach over any period of time. I mean, I run into enough people in my daily life that creep me out in some way, but to go to work and know you'll have to encounter child molestors, theives, the drug world, con artists, etc. - I personally couldn't do it. That being said, I really do admire the men and women of the police force who try to do a good job, and literally sacrifice their lives for the sake of the community.

I really do wish you and your family well, and thank you very much for your message. It actually was a rather difficult one to respond to because after my attack I had so much rage in me, and police officers were definately at the forefront. Anyways, to read what you wrote was not comfortable for me whatsoever because it reminded me of who I indiscrimately hated - somebody's father (this one especially unnerved me), husband, friend, etc. - kind of shook me up, actually because I cannot believe the extreme animosity I psychologically felt for a whole group along with dehumanizing everybody in it (that's the mindset of people in eugenics, the Nazi's, and even how genocides are allowed to happen) - it truly scares me that I got to think like this. At any rate, although I [thankfully] no longer have the hatred I once had I still very much appreciate messages such as yours because they do a wonderful job of "humanizing" police officers, the jobs they endure, and in your case the families that love them.

Thanks for taking the time to respond to my writings, and do hope for the safety and well-being of your husband for both yourself and the young children. These words come from me at a very deep level, by the way.... .

Take care, Vicky.